It seems a lot of people, both men and women take sex far, far too seriously. This actually lowers the quality of lovemaking sessions dramatically. It's one thing to be passionate, and quite another for it to be a serious "workout session".
If you're new to this area of life here are some beginner sex tips. The best attitude to adopt is a lighthearted one where you playfully experiment with your lover. Don't be afraid to make mistakes or do something stupid.
There's nothing worse than having a lover who is desperate to orgasm or treats sex as an exercise workout or something to win at. Sex isn't a competition (although sex games do exist and these can sometimes have a competitive edge and can be lots of fun). But generally lovemaking is an intimate physical communication between two people, or sometimes more, who are enjoying the pleasure of exploring each others bodies with their senses.
To get into a playful frame of mind during sex it's a good idea to relax, focus on enjoying yourself and providing pleasure for your lover. There's nothing worse than being with someone who is clearly stressed about having sex!
If you relax and enjoy the sexual sensations, you'll soon get immersed into the experience and this is where the passion and fireworks grows from; a relaxed immersed state of mind.
Beginners often make the mistake of over-focusing on and analysing their lovers pleasure, often worrying about whether their partner is enjoying themselves or not. They are literally having sex, not enjoying it themselves and are worrying about whether their lover is enjoying themselves! Can you see the mistake here?
It's really important to learn how to enjoy yourself first when you're a beginner, because if you can't enjoy yourself you're unlikely to give as much pleasure as possible to your lover. This aspect of enjoying yourself comes from relaxing and exploring the different sensations.
Done with a playful and experimental attitude you'll soon become more competent at sex and give yourself and your lover more pleasure. So don't take sex too seriously and have fun with it! Remember sex isn't work, it's a pleasurable activity.
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